Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Ladies don't puke and tell
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
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