I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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