What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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