went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Randomize
