Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize