i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Randomize
