let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
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