It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize