Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
