bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
