I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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