i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
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