were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize