hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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