I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
