Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
the liver wants what the liver wants
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
