Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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