I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize
