help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Randomize
