It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
