yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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