i just google imaged poop.
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
21 MILFs That Made The Boys Crazy
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
The air was thick with penises
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
23 Ladies Who Have Mastered The Art Of Squirting
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another