It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Randomize
