thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
