VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
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