okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
