Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
