Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
We named our party play list daddy issues
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
You're like the curious george of whores
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
