Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
I currently don't understand fingers.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize
