Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Randomize
