her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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