Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize
