In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Randomize
