It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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