you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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