just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
he was CRYING into my vagina
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
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