What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Randomize
