i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
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