I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
