Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
25 Cringeworthy Below the Pants Injuries
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?