I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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