Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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