Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Randomize
