dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize