he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
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