i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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