Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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