Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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