Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
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