so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I would fuck him just for his dog
Why are your pants in the freezer?
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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