Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Randomize
