it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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